Today I wrote a lot of negative blogs. I started three of them in fact. I talked candidly about the messiness of my heart with some dear friends in my life this afternoon. My heart aches for the place where I felt lived among joy and freedom and openly broken people.
I miss cuddling with these girls every week. I have never felt so loved.
I miss everything about this girl. Thank goodness for skype and January 5th!
And yet, when the pain and the ache is so tangible, I am so blessed and reminded of the Lord's faithfulness and sovereignty when I am with these girls.
And most of all I get to celebrate time with my family, perhaps the greatest reminder of the fact that I am dearly loved by an unfathomable Lord.
without thy sweet mercy, i could not live here
sin would reduce me to utter despair
but through thy free goodness my spirit revives
and he that first made me still keeps me alive.
thy mercy is more than a match for my heart
which wonders to feel its own hardness depart.
dissolved by thy goodness, i fall to the ground
and weep for the praise of the mercy i've found.
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